Peace during the Storm

Whenever there is thunder and lightning I like to turn everything off in the house and sit still. Mainly because I am afraid but also because there is a sense of peace that rests on me while I sit and listen. But how does one find peace in the midst of chaos and drama?

Negativity is the lead entertainer during chaos and drama. First and foremost, focus on the good things. "Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things" (Philippians 4:8).

Second, separate yourself from negative people (2 Timothy 3:2-5). Bad apples really do spoil good ones. My daddy used to say, "Show me your friends and I will show you your future."

Lastly, strive to be a positive example (Matthew 5:16) as there are enough negative folks stirring up drama everyday. You can bring hope to what seems to be a hopeless situation, light to dark moments, kind words where there is verbal attack. You can be someone's peace during their storm.

Have a sweet day,
Shaneka

Let it Go

Last night I briefly watched a show on TLC about people who are hoarders. Believe it or not, a large aspect of hoarding is psychological. Many times hoarders substitute their emotional pain with objects. After a while their home is filled with more and more junk. For those who are not hoarders, we assume it should be easy to just throw the unnecessary stuff away. Well, for hoarders its not that simple.

For a brief moment I started to wonder about what I was hoarding. Not physically but mentally and emotionally. Once I realized what I have been negatively holding on to I started to brainstorm about how to let it go. This thing had stifled me in a manner where I could not grow completely. I felt like a beautiful flower that was only getting part of the sunlight but not all of it. The difficult part for me was wondering what people would say about me. I tend to take care of others before nurturing myself. Immediately I knew that had to stop. I cannot be a gift to someone if I do not take the time to carefully wrap myself. Today I'm letting go of needing my mother's support and approval. I'm letting go of waiting for her to say, "I'm proud of you." I am letting go of wanting to place my head in her lap and just cry if I want to. I am letting go of needing to be strong because that is what others expect of me. I'm letting go of the "what if" and focusing on "what I can."

My BFF

For the past week my three year old daughter has been grieving over the fact that a little girl at school not wanting to be her friend. At least five times a day she says, "Mommy, Lala said I'm not her friend anymore." After hearing her talk about this little girl eveyday, I knew it was critical for me to say the right thing. I couldn't down play the situation. I said, "It looks like you're pretty sad about that." My daughter said, "Yes I am and Lala is not nice." I told my daughter that when she doesn't do something Lala wants her to do, then Lala will say mean things. I reminded her that friendship should feel good. Its about sharing, laughing, and having fun. I also told her the next time Lala says that to her to tell Lala, "I don't care, I have friends!" Its true, she does have friends. She has me and her daddy and her whole family. Most importantly, she has God.

As I look back, the friends that are still in my life add value and meaning. Those who I chose to let go were not good for me. There is one friendship that has not waivered and that is my relationship with Christ. He loves me when I am at my worst. He hasn't said He won't be my friend anymore. He hasn't left me and I have decided I won't leave him either. The gospel songwriter, Marvin Sapp, sang, "He saw the best in me when everyone else around could only see the worst in me." Joseph M. Scriven wrote a poem to his mother in 1855. It is now a hymn sang all across the world, "What a friend I have in Jesus all of my sins and griefs to bear. What a privilege it is to carry everything to God in prayer." To sum it all up, He is my BFF.

Have a sweet day,
Shaneka